HOLINESS: ULTIMATELY, INTIMACY WITH GOD

Irene and Jonathan, Dec. 1969

We build relationships with others through two “variables”:  proximity and frequency of contact.  In social psychology it's called the acquaintance process. Proximity and frequency of contact are the powerful ingredients in the process of becoming acquainted with someone, building rapport, trust, friendship, and eventually intimacy.

  When I was courting my wife in college, I worked at getting to know her and her to know me by getting close and connecting with her throughout the day.  I would meet her after class, walk her to the next class, arrange my schedule around hers, and make little dates like eating lunch and dinner together in the college dining commons.  Each day I could hardly wait to see her again.  Back then it was about theory and practice. I read about the acquaintance process in my first social psychology class and decided to live the theory by practicing the acquaintance process. I engaged proximity and frequency of contact.  I became increasingly in touch with the girl of my dreams and married her toward the end of our college days together.  That was 44 years ago.

Did not our hearts burn within us as he talked with us on the road . . . Luke 24:32

When’s the last time you woke up and said to yourself, “I need to be with God today”?   While we may anticipate an important meeting or date with someone,  as Jesus's followers, we struggle with anticipating opportunities to meet with God.   We don’t think  about our proximity and frequent contact with Him throughout the day.  Before the legs swing over the bed and the feet hit the floor, very few people say,  “I can’t wait to spend time with you, Lord”.  I could be wrong, but it is rarely at the top of our list of things we look forward to when we awake.  Isn’t the Christian life potentially a daily walk with Christ and an increasing acquaintance with him?  Our close relationship and frequent opportunities for interaction with Him are paramount to everything we do going forward into the day.   At the heart of our relationship with God is the opportunity to draw near and encounter Him as he waits to encounter us.

The challenge is beyond having occasional hits of contact with God.  It is more than a spontaneous call for help when a crisis arises, more than the flash of memory to pray for someone we promised.  It is more than dependence on someone else’s walk with Christ to provide an awareness of His love and presence.  The challenge is a matter of continual awareness.  We sense that He is present.  We know that He wants a growing relationship. He longs for us to continually walk with him (Micah 6:8 – “walk humbly with your God.”)  He wants us to not only grow in the grace he provides.   He longs for residence, infilling our hearts and lives.  He wants us to be productive and fruitful in the life we live.  Jesus makes it very clear -

If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit.  Apart from me you can do nothing.”  -John 15:5

"I give . . . water welling up to eternal life." John 4:14

You can’t get a closer encounter with Christ than to remain in Him.  We remain by  “habits of the heart” (Bellah, et. al.) in the “spirit of the disciplines” (Dallas Willard). John Wesley would say we remain in him through means of grace including immersion in the Word of God, an active prayer life (personal and communal), public and private worship, and the sharing testimonies with others.  Other means of grace are wholesome reading, music, and fellowship with other Christians, giving thanks and praise to God and to others, and being intentionally engaged in acts of mercy, charity, and doing good to others, especially the marginalized, oppressed and poor. These means help remind us that Christ is present.  They help us understand his essence.

The journey of proximity to Christ and daily, frequent contact with him leads to greater things.  As we seek to remain in Him, He makes us His dwelling.  The acquaintance process occasions intimacy with God.  He transforms us into persons of holiness and means of grace for others.  In a growing acquaintance with Christ, we find the power of proximity and daily contact.  Ultimately we find intimacy with God.  May it be ever so!